Dating rules are needed firstly because as Christians, whatever we do must not violate Gods instructions to us about how we should live our lives as Christians. We are to live holy with pure intentions, actions and thoughts and we are to live like Christ not like the world and that extends to dating as well. "Do not conform any longer to the patterns of this world.." - Romans 12:2
Christian dating rules are needed because if we are honest with ourselves most of us got our ideas and concepts about dating from the world through television, films, soap operas, talk shows and other forms of media sources. As a result we have worldly views of the dating process, we end up dating according to the standards of the world where there are hardly any boundaries and anything goes.
People that date according to the "worlds" standard see nothing wrong with kissing on the first date, they see nothing wrong with having sex on the first date, and they see nothing wrong with one night stands and having multiple partners. Such are the standards of the world, but if we are to do things differently from the world then we must have a set of christian dating rules that we follow to guide our actions.
But if we want to please God (the key word being "if") then we can't do it the world's way. Yes we are in the world but we are to be salt and light in the world and not conform to darkness and ignorance of the world.
You meet this guy or girl, and it's perfect from the beginning, you hit it off, you get along great, you seem to share common interests and really enjoy their company. Before you know it you are starting to get emotionally involved. You see each other all the time, you spend a lot of time together and again before you know it you're sleeping over at their house or they're sleeping over at your house.
The next thing you know, you're physical involved and sexually involved. The first time was a mistake, but then it keeps happening, then it becomes a habit, you tell yourself "well we're going to get married anyway so it okay right.." And all this within just a few weeks or months of dating - where were the boundaries? (By having and following a set of Christian dating rules, you will have bundaries in your dating relationships to protect you.)
The next thing you know they're acting funny, they start being deceitful, they lie to you, they start making excuses, they need time off from the relationship - then the inevitable, they don't want to be with you anymore. They leave you heartbroken, they leave having taken a precious part of you and every time you see them after that you feel awkward and ashamed regretting ever meeting them and allowing yourself to give them something so precious - Your Body.
Many people can relate with the above example because it's very common. I've seen it happen over and over and I myself was once a victim.
It is because of issues like this that Christian dating rules are needed. I want to help people build defenses to help protect themselves while dating so that they don't end up being taken advantage of, so that they can sort out the good people from the bad people and so that they can sort out the potential life partners from the ravening wolves.
While it is not okay for people to take advantage of each other during dating, you also must be responsible for your own actions while you are dating, it's easy to point at how people have wronged us, but if we as individuals were more cautious sometimes during dating and set up boundaries for ourselves, we would avoid much of the hurt and pain that we experience. In essence, these Christian dating rules are there to help you and guide you so that you dont get hurt during your dating experience.
Heavy petting and non-intercourse sexual activity
Can we do other intimate stuff as long as we dont have sex?
What are the rules when it comes to dating unbelievers
Is it okay to date unbelievers or non-christians and if not why?
Do I have to tell my partner everything about my past? what are the rules?
Is it necessary to tell your partner everything about you, even past mistakes that you are ashamed of and have been keeping a secret..
Keep Your Hands Off My Man! (Or Woman)
Thou shall not steal another woman's man or another man's woman. Go get your own and leave mine alone!
Acting Like Husband And Wife Without First Saying 'I DO'
The dangers of sleeping with him, ironing his clothes and cooking for him when he hasn't even put a ring on your finger.
Dating more than one person at a time - Is it okay?
Lord is it Sarah or Samantha, Daisy or Denise...
Why do you Christians have these stupid dating and relationship rules?
Shouldn't you just go with the flow, why do you need the bible to show you how to have a perfect relationship...
Who should pay for dates?
Should a guy always pay or should the girl pay, whats the rule?
Didn't find the exact information you were looking for on this page? try the Ask Your Questions page for more great advice. Read the advice we have given to other people on specific questions they have asked, or simply ask your own question.