The Courtship Games Christian Singles Play

Courtship is an exciting game that keeps you up at night, without appetite at meal times, and guessing every single step of the way. During courtship couples often play love games that keep the excitement alive and keep the other person guessing about their intentions. Sometimes these games are deliberate and thought out. Other times they are played out unconsciously in an effort to hide misgivings and feelings of inadequacy.

If you are new to courtship, love games can be very confusing. This is especially true if the object of your affection says no when he or she really does not mean no. Naturally, the first initial reaction is to back off when your beau says no, but do they really mean no? Or are they engaging in a game to spice things up or hiding feelings of self loathing?

The following are several scenarios where no may not really mean no. Of course, it will be up to you to figure out if your partner is playing a game with you, if they are masking insecurities, or if they really do mean no.

* Flirting - Sometimes your partner may say no to flirt with you. While they have every intention of saying yes eventually, they will continue to say no just to keep you guessing and in a state of anticipation. This is an exciting love game that is very easy to figure out. All you have to do is watch your mate's body language and mannerisms. Do they smile or turn away to hid their emotions? Are they playful in the way they say no? If so, you are likely being played with.

* More Time - No can also mean that your partner needs more time. This is especially true when it comes to major life decisions. For example: A negative response to a marriage proposal may mean nothing more than "not right now."

* Reassurance - If someone says no, they may need more reassurance. Many times someone will say no because they are afraid of saying yes and getting hurt. By turning you down, they feel like they are protecting their heart.

* Self Doubt - People who say no may also be dealing with feelings of self doubt. They may not feel that they are good enough for you. By saying no they may feel that they are sparing you the heartache of settling for someone who is unworthy of you.

Communication is vital in all of these scenarios. If someone says no to a major question but is still willing to continue the relationship, you need to ask them why they said no. A heart to heart will usually fix all problems and may even change the answer from no to yes. But do not get discouraged if it doesn't. Patience is a virtue and is vital in any type of relationship. No matter if you have been dating for years, be patient with your partner. Learn the reasons for their answers and everything will be just fine.

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