How “I just want to feel close to him/her” leads to fornication.
Too often, a guy and a girl start dating and before long they believe they are in love and with that comes the desire to want to ‘express that love’ and they believe the only way they can do that is through becoming physically intimate with eachother.What’s amazing is that within a month of knowing eachother, most couples who are still dating or in courtship (even Christian couples) have already crossed all the boundaries. They cross the touch boundary so that it’s no longer a holy peck on the cheek but French kissing, they begin to explore eachother bodies, and entangled themselves in a soul tie and blood covenant through sexual intercourse. The thing with fornication is that it disguises itself under the pretense of just “wanting to feel close to the other person.” When a relationship begins to grow, the two people naturally want to start to get closer and become intimate, you start to desire to touch and be touched by the other person as a way of feeling close to them and expressing what you feel for them.So as a result of wanting to feel close, the barriers begin to come down gradually. An innocent hug turns into a back massage, a peck on the cheek turns into a peck on the lips and that eventually evolves into French kissing. The ministry of the "laying on of hands" also starts, it starts off with touching none private parts of the body, then you want to see how far you can go without having intercourse so you begin to push the boundaries more and more until you’re touching each other’s private areas with clothes still on and eventually you’re reaching underneath the clothes because you want to feel their skin “you want to feel closer.” Very soon you feel the clothes are getting in the way and before long you graduate to taking eachothers clothes off and when touching with clothes off is not enough then what do you think is next? Of course the whole process doesn’t happen in a day, it is progressive, the more you spend time together in private the more the boundaries get pushed until you have gone too far and it becomes difficult to stop. Many Christian singles who are dating or still in courtship have found themselves trapped in this sexual bondage out of wanting to just “feel close” to one another, they may not have started off with the intention to fornicate but that is usually the end result and the thing is once you’ve fornicated once, the tendency is to want to continue and make excuses like “we’re going to get married anyway.” The time of courtship and dating is not the time for sexual games, it’s not the time to play the “let’s see how far we can push the boundaries without having sex” game. It is not the time for exploring each other’s bodies but a time to explore each other’s minds.
Learn What The Bible Really Says About Sex! * How should Christians view and treat those living in defacto relationships? * Do men and women today really have to wait until they are married before having sex? And what happens if they don't? * Have you ever wondered why Jesus gives an 'exception' for divorce in only one gospel? * Or why men described as 'righteous' in the Old Testament were allowed more than one wife? * And have you ever pondered how these and other biblical teachings on sex can be translated into your life today? The bible, sex, and this generation will give you answers to these questions and more. You can even download the first five chapters for free. Click Here To Check Out This Great Book! Many like to play ignorant and think that they have only sinned when they have had intercourse, but Jesus said that thinking about having sex with someone you are not married to in itself is just as bad as having the intercourse so stop kidding yourself. When sex enters the equation too early in a relationship it is dangerous. Many will continue to remain in a relationship that is bad for them because they know they have already crossed the sexual boundary and as a result want to try and force the relationship to work even though it becomes evident that the two of them are not compatible. It is difficult to break up an unhealthy relationship when you know you’ve already given your body to the person (especially for women.) Another thing is that sex stops the communication between the two of you, so that whenever you get together, instead of spending time talking and getting to know eachother and finding out whether you want the same things from life and see whether you are compatible in terms of your world view, goals and outlook; instead whenever you get together all you want to do is have sex, so you are no longer growing as a couple even though you think you are, you are deceived to thinking you are really close because you are intimate and having sex but when it’s time to talk you find that you have nothing to talk about because your relationship has become purely sexual and you have nothing to really talk about. Any relationship that will last needs to have a solid foundation of friendship and communication and most importantly of all conducting your relationship in a way that pleases God. The physical aspect of relationships really is the least important but unfortunately for many they made it the most important and have been hurt and burnt as a result. This article is meant as a wakeup call and I wanted it to be as real as possible. Stop all this “I want to feel close to him or I want to feel close to her” business, if you want to get closer, then get closer intellectually, get closer through communicating, get closer by being eachothers friend, spend less time laying down and more time talking. Even after you’ve married you will find that you will spend more time talking than in the bedroom and God help you if you have nothing to talk about. So why not spend more time developing communication in your relationship instead of violating eachothers bodies because ultimately, it is the ability to communicate effectively that will make your relationship strong and not your ability in the bedroom. I mentioned in the earlier part of this article how the whole process begins, if you find yourself engaged in activities like touching through clothes etc then you are already in dangerous territory and now would be a good time to kill those habits before it goes any further. Break the habit now before it becomes a bondage. Whatever you compromise to get you will eventually lose.
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